I’ve written posts on social media referencing some of my family history. I’ve talked about items like books, pictures, and candlesticks. And often times my family history comes through my writing, guiding, programing, and so much of my daily life. I’ve never written it in one place with ALL of the details. Really that’s the case for many of us. Family histories are becoming a popular thing to looking into from 23andme and hereditary.com and TV shows that track histories for celebrities and more. However, I’m lucky that my family documented their history pretty well.
My maternal grandfather’s father, my great-grandfather, arrived in the United States
from Zholbin, Russia to work and raise money to bring his wife, Anna, and three children (two girls, Hana (Anche) and Sara (Shirley) and a boy, Shlomo (Sam)). Joseph worked and worked and worked, and after seventeen years he saved enough money to bring his family to the United States. When his wife finally arrived, it had been SO long since they had seen each other, that the only way my great-grandparents found each other was to be the last ones on the port’s platform!! We have a picture of the ship itinerary with all four of their names on it.
My great- grandparents fell in love all over again and had my grandfather, Louis. My great grandmother died when my grandfather was all of six years old, and the next few years led to my grandfather moving to a Jewish orphanage in New York City. Men didn’t raise children then, and his older siblings had families of their own. But, my grandfather was a resilient man and grew up to pay his own way through his B.S., M.S., and Ph.D.
My grandmother’s family has a similar story.
Great- grandfather Jake on my maternal grandmother’s side arrived to the United States from a shtetl in Kolno, Poland with his two brothers Sam and Max. He had to work for many years to bring his wife and a son over as well. When my great grandmother Esther, called Etke, arrived to New York with her son, Abe, she had to decide what it was she was going to bring with her to a new country. It was a totally new world with a new language, new culture, and new sites—everything was new.
She didn’t have a lot of space in her luggage to bring her entire house. She had to make very careful decisions about what to bring. Obviously, she packed clothes and other basic items for her and her child. But she also packed some items that reveal how important Judaism was to her. Firstly, she packed her two little Kiddush cups that she used on Friday night Shabbat dinners. Kiddush is the blessing over wine, and often times Jews pour the wine into a cup specifically for that purpose. She used them week in and week out every Shabbat and on holidays. It is a household item in many observant households. So it would make sense that she made sure she brought them with her.
She also brought her prayerbook with her on the long trip to the U.S. She was a religious woman, so daily prayer would be important to her. There are differences between Eastern European, Ashkenazi, Jews, and Spanish, and many Middle Eastern, Sephardic Jews. One of the differences is while Sephardic Jewish services are more communal focused, there is an extra emphasis in Ashkenazi Judaism in reading the words while you’re saying them. That means having a prayerbook would have been quite important for my Ashkenazi great-grandmother.
And the last items, at least the last item I’ll mention, were her Shabbat candlesticks.
These are big, tall candlesticks. Every Friday night, candles are lit right as Shabbat is beginning—the same for holidays like Rosh HaShanah, and Passover. And so like the previous items I talked about, these were going to be essential in my great-grandmother’s life. And she would use all of these items throughout her life.
All of these items—the Kiddush cups, the prayerbook, and the candlesticks—were passed down to my grandmother, the youngest of four children. My grandmother, Fran, was one of three born in the United States. She grew up in New York City with Yiddish as her first language, but also to earn her Master’s degree in Math Education.
My maternal grandparents met through my grandfather’s sister when she was working at an overnight summer camp.
My grandfather went to visit his sister, and the minute my grandmother saw him she knew they would one day get married. And sure enough, soon they did get married. They had three children, the eldest is my mother. They moved out of New York City and raised my mother and her two brothers in upstate New York.
My mother grew up to earn her Ph.D. in Asian Theater, and went on to teach as a Professor, direct hundreds of students in plays, and advise them through building careers throughout the theater, acting, and dance worlds. Her mother, my grandmother, passed down the kiddush cups, prayerbook, and the candlesticks that made their way to the United States from Poland to my mother who moved further away from New York City to western New York, married my father, and had my two brothers and me.
I am the only girl, the middle child, and the third generation of only girls. Raised in western New York, I grew up as one of the three Jewish students in my central school district—my older brother, my younger brother, and me. I spent every summer at Jewish overnight summer camp; I spent Sundays at the Sunday school at our synagogue.
In 2005, I made my first trip to Israel with the NFTY summer program.
I’ve written about my travels to Israel, and my background before. So I’m going to jump ahead to 2016, when I married my husband in Haifa. My mother came two weeks before the wedding… with the Kiddush cups and candlesticks (the prayerbook I’ve had since I was little) from Poland. That means the candlesticks have travelled from Poland to the United States, and from the United States to Israel.
In a way, they’ve come home. The foundation blocks of Judaism were formed in ancient Israel. It was in Israel that the traditions of the Kiddush cup and Shabbat candlesticks began. My Kiddush cups and candlesticks weren’t “born” in Israel, but they have arrived in the country where their traditions began.
I will continue to use them and take care of them. Every time I use the candlesticks or Kiddush cups on Friday, I will remember the generations of women before me. And of course, I will pass these items down to my children and to the generations that come!
